In the Car

When driving past a cemetery, ‘You know, that is the dead centre of town!’

When driving past a cemetery, ‘That place is pretty popular, people are dying to get in there!’

When driving past a cemetery, ‘They put the fence up to keep everyone in!’

When driving past some black and white cows, ‘Boy it must be cold out there, those cows are Friesian!’

‘Where are we Dad?’ …. ‘In the car’

When there is a slow driver in the way, ‘Come on!! What are you waiting for? Christmas?’

When driving past a woman, ‘ahh, she was good from far, but she’s far from good.’

When driving past a woman. ‘Marks out of ten? I’d give her one!’

When an emergency service vehicle goes past with siren blazing, ‘You’ll not sell many ice creams going that fast.’

When driving past someone washing their car, ‘you can do mine next, if you want!’

When reading from one of those information signs out in the countryside…

“The rocks you see before you are 26 million years old…”

“Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you…